All in a Day's Work

My job rocks!

and I rock my job!

Do you feel like you should go floss now? You should.

So, this guy comes in, 68 years old, and has never had his teeth cleaned. Why did he choose this as the opportune time? 50 year high school reunion of course! When he opened, it was like Christmas and I shed a small tear of joy. I was thrilled to actually use my mad skills to their full potential. You can actually see the indentations in his gums where the tartar was resting. (I saved the pieces for a while, but Guinness book didn't call me back, so I let them go.)

P.S. Yes, those are my bare fingers in the pictures pulling down his lip. My hair and arms and skin parts not covered by clothing or glasses or mask were already covered in his blood and chunks of germ-coated tartar what was a little spit on my fingers going to do?
And, no, he's not the least concerned with the broken off tooth or the BAC's (big A-- cavities,) he's got clean teeth (that are now loose because all of the supporting tartar is gone.)


That's all. I'm off to the Be-otch!

This is why I'm hot.... or not... (RSV2)

Emily, I don't have anything to say! So, if anyone has any complaints about how lame this post is, direct all annoyed comments to her. Anyhow, all of my posts could be titled "Random Sampler version __," (acronym RSV_) but in an effort to keep you all posted on my typical daily life, here it goes.

Last week, my neighbors were out of town and so I got their mail. I thought we got a lot, but I was mistaken. This pile measured 6 inches high and had every single catalog printed during the month of July, and was topped with a box of checks. I loved looking at each catalog from Crate and Barrel to Lillian Vernon to Scouting... what a treat. I was dying to open the checks, just to see what kind they get, but resisted the temptation.


On Friday, I thought about making banana bread. It sounded good, and I thought Oakley would eat it, because he won't eat baby food anymore (apparently he's developed a sophisticated palate at 1) and has no teeth so I need something that will mush easily. I had heard from someone that when your bananas get ripe to put them in the freezer and it keeps them so you don't have to make bread right away. I had noticed that they had been getting continually blacker and didn't think much of it. I got them out to make bread and let them thaw out, but they were like raisin bananas, and it grossed me out too much. Jason was greatly relieved, (he's been freaked out by the bananas for a few months) and I made pancakes instead, and Oakley INHALES them.


Living with boys sometimes sucks. Who wants to walk into this?


To help his future wife, I'm trying to teach Oakley to start putting things away when he gets them out. He's good at getting them out, but not so good at putting away. So, instead I make him sit in a chair with nothing to play with and watch me clean up.


I don't think it's working / my child is so spiritual, I think he's trying to be a shepherd. When are Easter Pageant try outs?


Lastly, today I got home from Target and JoAnns and realized my zipper was down, and I hope it made someone's day (oooh, scary kitty.)

Day Makers!

Who doesn't love the simple joys in life?
Here are my most recent:

1.) Can you believe how thoughtful Crisco is? I almost jumped for joy when I saw this at the store, and then it was on sale for less than the store brand! This JUG of oil is designed fabric softener style with an easy pour spout and the lid is a measuring cup! What a fantastic idea! Now, I don't have to dirty another measuring cup! (When I'm cooking all the time with lots of ingredients...)

2.) My kid does have enough hair to get bed head! It was amazing, him faking like he was sleeping enough to get this crazy MOP! Oh, and he makes hideous faces. (Apparently I unknowingly play the ugly face game?)

3.) I won. After 30 minutes followed by another 45 minutes of SCREAMING, Oakley did, finally, go to sleep. And I got a fabulous shower and shaved my legs and have a spotless kitchen. I can ignore a baby. We'll see how that goes tonight. (Maybe my friend Ben (adryl) will need to spend the night.)

4.) Harry Potter movie comes out tonight! I'm probably not going to see it because it is so much better in my head, but I still love all the hype! It's so exciting!

(and I want this shirt)

On a not day maker note... Ginormous has made it into Webster's dictionary as of today. I hate the word, but will no longer be totally annoyed when any of you say it.


Oh well, 4 out of 5 isn't bad! Love ya'll!

Happy Birthday my Baby Boy!

Last year today it was raining. I think the angels were sad to give up this little one. Time goes too fast. Cheers to you, my wonderful child! XOXOXO!

Baby got back (and I'm ADD)

Okay, so I'm back, from nowhere, other than not blogging because I had nothing to say. (Yes, still trying to rebound from the non-funnies that I caught when I was super cranky a few weeks back.)
Anyhow, thanks for all the well wishes to Oakley, luckily, the pukes were short-ish lived, just a 14 hour bug and he was back to his monkey-self the same day. He says thanks for feeling bad for him. (Excuse his clothes, he had puked on everything he owned.)So, different thought, you can hear the locusts now. It's so summer!

And I replaced this sprinkler head by myself, and it' even buried under the grass so it won't cut me up if I decide to slip and slide on my lawn.

Lastly, did you know Extreme Makeover is back on? Yes, it is! It was the same time as Age of Love, so I had to keep flipping back and forth, but you won't believe what they did for this girl!
Big fat tears rolling down my face, they are amazing!

Anyhow, that's all, Happy 4th of July! (eve!) Remember how cranky I was last year on this day and the next because I was flipping overdue and hot? Sorry!