I'm not allowed to shower.

And then this, again. It's a little hard to type this way.CPS be on alert.

Bonk.

Just to let you know, I am up for watching kids, anytime. I love for Oak to have someone else to play with.

The caveat.... I'm not so good at it. If you take me up on my offer, you might want to invest in one of these.


Poor Brynn, fell while climbing into the crib and bonked her eye. It immediately swelled up and turned purple. She now has a nice black eye to remember what fun she had at my house.
The upside is I'm as good at watching your kid as I am mine, meaning I'll treat them like my own. Oakley fell while getting off the trampoline and got a good scrape and goose egg. It matches his bruise on his eyelid that I don't even know what it's from. So, call me anytime!

The Excitement Continues!

So the lack of posts lately is not due to nothing going on, I've had a ton going on:

Senior dinner
Being Melissa's patient (she's fantastic by the way)
Scheduling windshield replacements
Learning more about dental implants
Camp stuff

But luckilly, I've had time for my big, big concerns:

I figured out how to take down the fruitfly empire that colonized in my garbage from the banana peels. You see, not being trained in the exterminating field, I would get frustrated whenever I pulled out the garbage and all these disgusting little flies would fly out. I would swing my arms frantically trying to swat some of the varmins. Finally, I figured out to leave the garbage out for a while and then douse it with Raid. It worked. Hooray! Seriously it only took me maybe 2 weeks.

I also learned about this fantastic website. Some lame, some hilarious. Definately worth looking at when you're at work, trying to look busy. I think this one was titled "ideal man." Enjoy.
And of course, what could keep me busier than cleaning up after this little guy?

Happy Hot Tuesday!

Picture Time!

Dear Camera Phone Inventor,

Thankyou for your idea of combining two very useful objects, and giving me the opportunity to document all things that I think are funny, even when I don't have my real camera with me.

I mean, how else would I tell people about a pirate garage sale?

Or convince them that Taz got baptized?(Taz with halo on, pointing up to "CTR" in Old English)

Or that the scissor sharpening business is slow?(Lots of downtime for cross-stiching)

Or that I saw Jacob Black's truck at Target?

Or anything that's amusing and my camera is MIA?(forget about baby-bottle-rot, what about baby-candy-rot)

Well done, genius, well done.

Thank you camera-phone inventor, where ever you may be!

Sincerely,
SJP

I've Created a Monster.

No, not the child, well yes, he is a monster and I created him, but that's now what I'm talking about. Remember how cute Calvin and Hobbs were before Calvin turned all juvy and started pee-ing on things?Welp, I though this was cute, but now it's a nightmare.Oakley's dog, named Oakley's dog, is like a part of him. It goes everywhere with him... from room to room, to the store, to visit anyone, everywhere, he's always got him.As long as he's around, Oakley's happy,and will sleep, anywhere as long as the dog is with him.If he can't have him or find him, watch out, he goes nuts! When he's in the wash, Oak stands in the laundry room and screams/tries to climb on the washer/open the dryer.He even is stressed out if he can't see him when he's in the bathtub.I get tired of looking for that darn dog.