Anyhow, on with the list.
I absolutely cannot stand:
*Getting splashed.*
If I want to get wet, I'll do it on my own terms, thanks.
*Having the designated drink buttons pushed down on a lid.*
Only times I am okay with this is if I am in a group with lots of cups with dark colored soda and you don't want to accidentally drink someone else's drink. Then, and only then, I am okay with pushing a button. Only one. And it better be the right one. And I'll push it myself. If the right one isn't an option, none get pushed.
Thank you QT for not giving buttons to the drink lids.
*Incorrect use of the phrase,
'I couldn't care less.'*
Ug. I don't know how many times I have missed the rest of some conversation because someone says, "I could care less."
My brain gets so wrapped around the incorrect use of the phrase, holding back the urge to tell them, that actually the phrase isn't could care less, because that means that you do care, not that you don't. Seriously, I don't know how that can be so confusing to people.
Lastly, the reason that this whole rant got started:
*Bruce Springsteen and
the E Street Band.*
Jason LOVES them. Oh. My. Word. They are horrible!
If he could dance like this guy,
or was attractive, like this guy,
I'd let him slide.
But he's not.
He wears all black, but not sexy black. He wears an old black t-shirt, tucked into his old black Levi 550's, with his black braided belt, and has a snaggle tooth (#6 to be exact.)
He has a pirate in the band, and a lady with red hair. Also the bass player looks like he'd be so ridiculously annoying to talk to. The sax player is cool, he doesn't need a lanyard, and I respect him for that. The drummer though? Wow. He totally reminds me of the principal on Ferris Bueller's Day Off. He's probably as cool as him.
The most annoying thing about them is they jam. I'm totally fine with a song. Born in the USA? Sure. It's fine. But when they run out of words, they just jam and it makes me want to punch someone. End it allready.
Did I mention Jason LOVES him/them? He calls Bruce the Boss. He also loves to push down the buttons on lids and incorrectly uses the phrase 'I couldn't care less.'
Luckily, he's never splashed me, so we're still married.
16 comments:
I wish that you would correct people more on the "I could care less," debacle. Then you could be one of those nerdy people who are all, "I can't belive that you don't know how to say that phrase. You probably don't even know what an orc or Middle Earth is."
A-freakin'-men!
I couldn't agree more! (And I mean that.)...about J.T. and Brad and Bruce.
Thanks for ranting so well.
Okay so Devin is OBSESSED with Bruce Springsteen okay not obsessed but listens to them way way to much for my liking. I don't know about the whole E street band thing but I'm sure if I asked Devin he would be happy to give me a 20 minute fill me in conversation about it so I'll conveniently forget to ask him about it.
Oh and Devin hates when people say "I could care less" too so I say it on purpose like Jason does to him any chance I get and I say things like "that needs cleaned" because it drives devin crazy that I don't say "that needs {to be} cleaned" and yells TO BE at me anytime I say it wrong which I now do on purpose...and sometimes on accident too.
The end. sorry that was two paragraphs long.
my favorite line of rant =ed: "he doesn't need a lanyard, and I respect him for that."
lol. you are hilarious.
Dear Sara,
You are hilarious and it kills me the things you blog about. Pure genius! And dare I say babies are starting to look chubby? SO so so so so so so cute... even if Reese smelled like a baked potato. Hey he could smell like worse things right? Like the the smell of the E street band....ahhh just thinking of their smell reminds me of the smell of tagging in dry cleaning and old people. Sick.
I was laughing so hard about the pirate in the band. Who doesnt love a pirate. you are awesome, but you could probably care less. Right?
i couldn't care less about this post but it is to dang funny, so i do care. love it and i totally agree with all the things that bug you...although, i have a several more things i would like to add to the list!
That's funny because just yesterday when I was driving home I was having the "I could care less" rant in my head. However, I would say you may be the most neurotic Jones. I love pushing down all the pop buttons.
Jake
I'm sorry to say, I'm one of those crazy soda lid pusher-downer people. Sometimes I just push them down for fun, and all the other parts of the lid that can be pushed down too.
I totally don't get the Bruce Springsteen thing. I thought he was totally out, like years ago. I think that might just drive me crazy too.
Thanks for the fun rant!
I know we aren't actually friends, but since I stalk you and pretend we ARE friends...I thought I would comment and say- We are SO the same and should totally be REAL friends!! (We can keep Carol around to make the transition from crazy blog stalker to actual real friend easier if you want...) :)
Those things make me want to SCREAM!! Why do people HAVE to push down the buttons!? And I know this wasn't on the list exactly for this reason, but why don't people get the snaggle tooth fixed?? What are they freakin' waiting for!? I'll even help pay...whatever it takes...just go get some clean white teeth that are straight and don't make me want to gag!!
Xoxo,
Your Fav Stalker
okay Sara what happened to Jason like/love of Alan Jackson??? I can still remember him strumming the strings, and it was the same song for hours. The babies are getting bigger and so much better. Love you Susan
Ok I must admit that I frequently blog-stalk your blog. And I find it quite amusing. But this post top all. I was laughing so hard I had to comment. I totally agree with the lid thing. That bugs the living b-geez out of me. and straw chewing Ugh I don't need my straw to not give liquid. it's like when it breaks half way down and nothing comes out. Anyway, I think I might be inspired to do the same type of post except I think my list might be to long.
I hate when people push my platic cup buttons too!! My hubby does it on purpose to tick me off!! OYE!
Hey - I have a baby gift for ya. Where is the best place to leave it or mail it? Your work?
Email me and let me know (when you have time)sarahdoster@gmail.com
Could you be any funnier? Or possibly any more hormonal. :)
I agree with the Bruce comments because Tadd LOVES him too. We should get matching T-shirts with some witty boss slam printed on the chest. I'll work on it.
Also, I hate when people say supposebly. That's not a word. It's supposedly.
Another pet peeve is when people spell already, allready. (Check your post.) Ha ha... I'm just teasing you. I could care less that you put that.
Curse you Heather. You know you're ALLREADY smarter than me.
Ok- this is Julia, Philips sister.. & I have to admit that I look at your blog occasionally when I see it so nicely sitting on the side of Melissa's(&Philip's) blog. This made me laugh alot... & I have to agree with you mostly..except the soda button pushing... I do it every time to them all!!!
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